I have been reading every one's blogs and seeing all of the wonderful things that everyone has experienced in 2008, and I realized that I have not been to excited about moving into 2009. Since October I have been in a spiritual, mental, and physical rut. Maybe even depressed at some times and completely unmotivated! From the outside looking in you would think that I have ever reason to be completely excited, but I have not been. Then last night I woke up at 3 am with an overwhelming feeling of regret and sadness. I realized that I have completely shut down and let myself go. This is not like me at all so I decide now is the time to move forward and change.
I got up early this morning and started thinking about what I need and what I want. I made a list and I want to share it with you. These things are not in any order but some are more important than others. Some may even seem a little silly, but I think those little things are important also.
Here is my "What I Want" list:
To quit trying to have a house that is perfect and clean all the time.
To cook more and try new recipes. Cooking is one of my favorite things to do and I have quit.
To drink more hot chocolate. I forget how good it taste on a cold day!
To have a stronger faith!!! And to know that God is always in control and He wants what is best for me!
To stop worrying! To stop worrying! And let me say it again, TO STOP WORRYING! Especially about what other people think.
To light more candles. I love candles!
To read more and watch less TV.
To not be wasteful, especially with money. I want to be a better steward.
To, of course, eat healthier. To really care about what is going into my body.
And most importantly, to just be thankful of what the Lord has given me. TO COUNT MY BLESSINGS!
So there it is my list! And I know what some of you are thinking: My list has nothing about my husband and children on it. Well, actually they are in every detail of it. These are the things that I want that will help me be better. And if I am better to myself, I can be a better wife and mother to them!
Now, I am ready for 2009!
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3 comments:
I hope 2009 is wonderful to you! You are such a strong person! You have been through so much and deserve only great things! Hope everybody at your house is feeling better! We should definitely get together for a play date!
You will do great at all of those things! Especially the cooking.....I tend to be partial to your cooking though!!!! Glad you are all well now, that tends to make life a lot better!
this is Gaye; Amber's Mom. You just brought tears to my eyes. your list is what life is about. Before you know it your children will be gone and it will not matter what others think. you'll be asking yourself did I prepare them to not worry, enjoy life, know things do not have to be perfect and only God has all the answers and help. You go girl!!
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